Chris Padilla/Blog / Notes

Staying In the Ring

I spent a decade in creativity with clear goals and a seemingly direct path for success. Get the degrees, play with the right people, practice the right things, serve other people along the way, and a fulfilling career in music awaits on the other side!

Now, though, there is no clear path. There's no career to pursue, no obvious prize to chase, and there aren't all encompassing models for the things I want to make.

While I learned a great deal from this more success driven phase of my life, met wonderful people, and grew plenty as a person, I'm now looking ahead at new terrain.

What do you do when that script runs out? What do you do when you reach the end of where that map leads?

. . .

Earlier this week Miranda and I watched Rocky, both our first time seeing the classic film.

A hobbyist boxer with natural talent, the film finds him continually training and taking on small fights. A once-in-a-lifetime opportunity comes with a chance to fight for the championship against Apollo Creed.

To jump to the most striking moment in the film for me: Rocky finds himself nervous the night before the fight. He doesn't know that he can win. But, he commits to "going the distance," to staying in the ring through all 15 rounds. The refs ultimately call Apollo the winner, but only after 15 tough rounds, Rocky is still standing at the end.

These days, that's where I find myself creatively.

I've had to relearn enjoying the practice for it's own sake. After spending time with contests to perform in and hoops to jump through, it's easy to get caught up thinking there's something the work needs to "win" with.

Anytime I find myself using the old map for my practice, a sense of defeat comes in and motivation is zapped. Without knowing it, a sublte voice has been asking "What is this going to get me?" And it's been the wrong question.

The better question: "How can I keep doing this for as long as possible?" "This" being any medium and practice that sparks imagination and stirs something deep within. At present: music, art, writing, and software.

With Rocky, the better aim is staying in the ring. How can we roll with the punches, get back up when we're down, and continue engaging round after round?

Later films, naturally, follow a journey where Rocky does eventually win it all. While it's a satisfying story when the conclusion puts our hero on top, with all of the accolades and success in the world, I can't help but think the first movie in isolation has a more meaningful message. Regardless of the outcome, victory comes from staying in until the end.